Tips to Deal with Fear of Public Speaking

 Fear of public speaking is not just when you have to stand on a stage to face a crowd of an audience. So many of us are hesitant in speaking with a small group and with new acquaintances. This fear can manifest in many different forms and in different settings for different people.

And it is one of the most unpleasant fears as it robs us of many important moments and steals from us many opportunities.  So many of us get tongue-tied even when we would like to impress someone in personal or professional capacity. The important presentations that you have worked so hard for can go southwards leaving you feeling embarrassed. 

So what is this fear of speaking in public and how can we overcome it?

Fear of speaking in public is directly related to our self-esteem. When we harbor low self- esteem we are very self- conscious and mostly judge ourselves harshly. We do not believe that we can do anything good and are sure that others would not like us either.  This creates a fear of being judged which almost paralyses us in public appearances.

Also speaking confidently needs us to have adequate knowledge of general matters and our subject in particular coupled with fluent language skills. When we are not in a habit of reading or catching up news regularly we lack concrete knowledge to speak about most topics. Many people who have passed their degrees by merely studying for the examinations and do not believe in frequently updating their subject related knowledge, seem to be at a loss of adequate data to contribute knowledge even about their professional domain.

If we understand this then it is simple to understand the remedy. We need to work on gathering knowledge regularly, improving our language skills and working on our self- esteem. All three are also related because when we work on improving any of our skills or knowledge, it directly boosts our self-esteem. However many a time we may need to seek professional help from counselors, language trainers or domain knowledge providers. Asking help from close friends or family can create a safe learning environment where we can start working on our growth without being judged.

Every speaker starts from a place of fear. It is time, hard-work, perseverance and a strong desire to attain the goals that separate the ones who succeed from the others. Know that it is a process and it is never complete. You are always growing and always learning. Especially as a public speaker you are always better at the next performance compared to the earlier one, even if just a wee bit. 

Caution: If you are looking for quick results, remember that happens only in magical fantasies. Once we know it is a process, it becomes easy to start and to remain focused at it for a very-very long time. 

If you believe this can help someone, do share. To connect with Dr. Sapna Sharma for Personal Counseling WhatsApp on 8446229088 from wherever you are in the world.

Believe in Your Dreams and Desires As You Plan Your Career

Dreaming is beautiful for it takes us into the world of possibilities. That is the world where everything seems to be possible and that is where all the new inventions are born first. And yet we are not encouraged much to dream. Rather we are discouraged from entering that world lest we would be lost to this world of reality.

As children, we have dreams that are called as fantasies. In those dreams we aim high. We look up to ourselves. When we come across some new things it brings a spark to our eyes. Some people we meet or read about make a deep impression upon us and we dream to become like them. Elders around us find it quite amusing and take pride in sharing it with others.

But as we grow up suddenly hundreds of hands reach out to pull us out of our dreams and to bring us back to the reality. Everyone is worried that the dreamer would never be able to do anything practical and would waste away his/her life dreaming.

In a way they are right because only dreaming does not take us much ahead on the road of life. But that does not make dreaming a crime or a time waster. Every big thing takes shape in the dreams of someone. All the beautiful architecture of the world has its roots in the dreams of their conceivers. Agreed, only dreaming does not do the magic of creation but without dreaming nothing new or big can be achieved. Many a big things do not happen in the world because many dreamers give up on the dreams. They believe on their distracters more than in their dreams.

Action is needed and dreams are needed too. Rather than throwing away your dreams cherish them. If you wish to build castles in the air, build them but then go ahead and put foundations under them with your hard work, perseverance, planning and determination. Set long term SMART goals by visualizing your dream come true. Work on short term goal plan to chalk out a route to the goal and then readjust your immediate goals like planning education and choice of study to start you on the path to achieving your dream goals.

While planning your career do not neglect any dreams or desires you have had about your future. Take these also into consideration and try to blend it with your aptitude, interests and value. It is possible to convert any dream into a reality by working on it realistically. Take help of people who are related to your dream career, ask for help, take guidance. Don’t forget to discuss your dreams seriously with your counselors.

Believe in your dreams and remember not to share your dreams lightly to non-believers. People who do not believe in dreaming big and accomplishing them often laugh on your dreams and belittle your faith in your dreams. This kind of people are all around us.

Beware of them. Remember you are different. You are not your friend, not your parents, not your sweetheart either. You are a unique creation and your dreams and desires would be unique. Do not lose faith in your dreams only because someone who loves you does not believe in your dream.

Talk of your dreams to only those who are action people and who aim high themselves. Work on all aspects of the dreams. Weigh the pros and cons and the risks and benefits equally. Help is available in the world in every form. If you have faith in your dreams and if you do your homework well, there would always be people willing to lend you a supporting hand.

So when you plan your career, keep a place in it for your dreams.